Bitter Ends
by xscreamingsilence
Summary: they're both bestfriends. they're both popular. But only one of them has something to drag him down. And that thing, seems to take his bestfriend with him... because of course, his bestfriend would do anything for him. His bestfriend wanted them to be more then friends.. but the strength to be able to admit it is lacked... hugely. michael/shane, M for later chapters. R&R.
1. Chapter 1

**HEY GUYS, so i KNOW i need to update 'Never The Same.' i am suffering writers block. i don't even have a CLUE why, but anyway, this story IS shane/michael. doesn't seem like it at first but it will be. it will hate lemons firther on, so don't like, don't read. The first chapter is set the day after allysa has died, before shane&his mum&dad flee. the next chapter can either be set when he goes back or set when he's away&the time he finds his mum dead. review on which one you'd like. ANYWAY onwards with the chapter;"). ** **SHANE. ** Shane didn't even know what to feel anymore. It wasn't even pain. It was more than that...much more. And being sat in the playground, surrounded by noisy kids, didn't make it much better. He jus narroed his eyes at the place where Allysa would usually be stand, chatting with her mates{ A/N idk if she was in high school, how old she is, I'm just guessing? So no hateeeee, please.} Then, of course , there was Michael Glass. Who inevitably was surrounded by girls: fluttering their eyelashes, practically drooling over that blonde hair, angelic look, and taunt muscles. Even Shane had to admit – though it made him cringe just a tiny bit to do so – Michael was beautiful. He knows. He knew and he wasn't doing anything about it. Instead he glances at Shane, and mouths; 'dude, you alright?' Shane doesn't tell him the truth. He doesn't even mouth anything back, he just does one simple action and one simple lie; a nod. Without a second thought, he stands up and walks, slightly weak legged, over to Allysa's locker. His fingers seem to stumble over the dial, until it swings open and pictures of his sister surround him. She's gone...and you can't do anything about it, Shane. He shakes his head and shoves his hand into the locker, grabbing a school book and tearing pages out. 'Shane,' a voice says from behind him. He knew he should turn to see who it is, but he doesn't. He knows that voic, and he's surprised he's come. Ignoring Michael, Shane carries on tearing at books, leaving the torn pages in messy piles on the floor. 'Shane, c'mon I know your upset. I get it, just come hang out with Cait and I and -' Shane cuts Michael off, his voice harsh and brittle. 'And who else? More girls. Too many to state is there, Mikey?' 'Why are you acting like this, Shane? C'mon, what happened? You're the big, bold, Shane. B for Brute force, remember?' 'They don't seem to see me.' He turns swiftly and points two fingers at the group of girls, before turning back to Allysa's locker. Bringing his fist back, he punches it and even though he doesn't see them, he feels the presence shift as more people begin to surround him. Shane stares down at his red knuckles for a second before punching it again. 'Shane! Stop!' Michael grabs at one arm, and a blonde girl grabs at the other. Shane automatically relaxes at Michael's touch and stops struggling, but his eyes still burn with anger. He doesn't let the tears escape. 'Leave me, I'm fine,' he chokes out, pulling his hand away and waving the blonde leaves shane alone. Michael doesn't. 'Dude,' he shakes his head. 'You're so broken, Shane. What's going on in your head? Why has one thing just knocked you down?' Shane turns again, taking in the boy's blonde rockstar style hair. 'Uh, I don't know? Wait! I got it! Maybe it's cause my sister just died?' he says sarcastically. Michael immediately looks ashamed. 'Sorry, man, I know that but..' Shane can't hold himself back. Michael loved Allysa like a brother too, and tears fill up in his eyes. Michael had always been the softer one of the two. But soon Shane hugs him and Michael hugs him back, patting his back. 'I just need time,' he says once they've both broken out of the hug. 'Go back to the girls.' A feint smile balances on Shane's lips as Michael nods slowly before walking off, hands in his pockets. When he's gone Shane reaches into the locker, and grabs the one thing he'd been searching for: the Claghda ring. Gripping it tightly in his palm, he slams the locker shut and storms off. Screw the rest of the day. He wanted to go home...he needed to cry. And he could only ever do that in his room, alone. Cause he was hardman Shane Collins. **Michael. 3rd POV** Michael stands there, surrounded by girls flicking their hair over their shoulder. He can't stop thinking about Shane. Even he hadn't missed the burn of tears in Shane's eyes when he'd reached into the locker and took something out. Then he'd stormed off. He also couldn't stop thinking about the hug. How desperate did Shane feel when he clinged on? Michael had felt the damp tears on his shirt. Shane never hugged. And he never cried. Usually. When Shane had hugged him, yeah, it shocked Michael. But it made him happy. Shane really was something special. Something Michael desired for. And he was beautiful in everyway. Michael had to admit it...he was developing feelings for him. **MOLLY 3rd.** Molly Collins sat there with her knees pulled up to her chest, feeling weak. She's pressed against Frank's solid side, and just for that second, everything's alright between the two. His warm arm is wrapped around her, making her feel safe and secure. The images in her head reply in her mind, and she can't even turn her head to look at the murky flat they're staying in for the time being. Usually she'd be at home, making dinner and waiting for Allysa to blow through the door laughing. Then Shane would blow through the door, knackered. But that wouldn't happen to day. It would just be Shane, looking depressed. 'I don't want to be in morganville,' Molly begins slowly, shaking her head. Frank looks up and stops the carressing circles on her hip. 'this town is **ing up my mind, Frank, I need out. We all do.' 'I agree with that.' Her husband's voice is gruff, and he nods. Molly heaves herself off his chest and looks at him. 'Let's go. Tonight. Let's flee and take everything with us.' 'Yeah,' he says. Molly collapses back on Frank's chest, tears running from her eyes. She doesn't know what to say anymore. Or do. But as her son blows through the door, she stands up, and waits for Frank to join her. 'Son, pack your things.' He says, in a bold tone. **There, done &dusted. Hope you enjoyed it;D. i tried to include an insight to molly fleeing. idk how old they was or if frank was EVER that loving but yeah.. review please?xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Ey ups guise! It's chapter 2 y4y! So I decided tp start this chapter a while after they've moved. Idk WHEN shane went back to Morganville, all I know is that he took drugs at one poinjt, and his mum died&he was the one to find her. So in this is includes when he fleees&him talking about frank and basically a summary of what happened since they moved. {when shane fleed I guessed he was about 15, now he's 18 &coming back. don't like that, don't read;L}**

**Shane.**

Shane presses his solid back against the cold wall, staring at the muckiness of the motel room. He let's his eyes drift and wander away to the needle down in his hand. Shaking slightly from the pain, he lifts up the needle, staring at it for a blank second, before pushing it into his arm. Immediately the pain is taken away. The pain of the hits. The punches. The pain of Alyssa And His mum. It all just disappears, and he's unconscious to life around him.

Then of course, not long after, he zones out, throwing his head back, pulling his knees up to his chest. He can't stop shaking, and he slowly closes his eyes, just for a few minutes. Then when his conciousness returns, he knows where he is, why he's here, and he can't stop the tears that roll desperately from his eyes. He wasn't upset No, he was angry. So angry that them bitches took his mum, that his dad takes his anger out on him. _I'm Just A Punchbag. _

Shane finds himself almost scared when his phone vibrates in his pocket, he flails and reaches around to grab it. His mind fuzzy, he doesn't look at the screen, and the voice shocks him. A voice he hasn't seen for 3 years.

'shane?' Michael's voice comes out, sounding just as desperate as shane would if he actually spoke, which he didn't do much of nowadays. Now a days he just nods, shakes his head, or begs his dad to stop.

'Michael.' All he says is 3 words back, but them three words force shane to stand up, abandoning the used needle, and talk while he throws his clothes into a bag.

_**I Need You. **_

**Michael**

Michael doesn't understand how he's been able to survive without him, but he did it for long enough until now. Now, Michael needed him. How would he get the groceries? How would he even be able to live like this, in the confinement of his home, trapped, floating most of the day. Cramming broken biscuits in his mouth every night, waiting for the pain to come, and for the transformation to take place.

'I'm coming.' His mate's voice sounds so hoarse, and broken. Which breaks Michaels heart all over again. Shane doesn't know that he's Michael mate yet, but soon enough.. He will.

'how long?' Michael asks desperately. He can't take another day of being like this, alone.

'an hour. I promise. No longer.'

'Alright,' Michael nods even though he can't see Shane, and hangs up. The best thing to do now is to wait, that one hour that will feel like a week. So he drags himself up onto the sofa, and rolls over, facing the fine leather, trying to figure out how to explain the ghost thing to Shane. Maybe he'd just keep it a secret.

A sharp knock at the door wakes him up, and the voice is one he needed. Rushing up, Michael slams the door open, and runs into the arms of the boy standing there. Shane looks awful, to be blunt. His hair is fine. But his skin is.. Pale and bruises are blooming over the surface, down his neck. Michael narrows his eyes, bruises in the shape of where hands would wrap around. A small growl escapes Michael's lips. But he shakes it off &pulls him into a hug. It seems to be tighter then all the others. More.. Loveable. Until shane winces as Michael's body presses against his.

'what's up?' he whispers. Of course he liked shane, but maybe.. Shane didn't like him back.

'Nothing.. I'm fine..' that face expression didn't look like he didn't want a hug. IT looked like he was almost in pain. Carefully, Michael takes the hem of shane's shirt in his fingers and pulls it off. He growls more.

'shane what happened out there?!'

'nothing.' shane shakes his head as Michael lifts a finger and trails it over the cuts and bruises covering his stomach. Some are yellowing and fading. Some are purple and new.

'This isn't nothing, who did this shane?'

'it doesn't matter. LEAVE it.' Michael nods quickly, although still concerned, and picks up two of Shane's four bags. He carries them up to the room.

**Shane.**

Shane chooses not to tell Michael about anything. Not the drugs. OR his mum. OR even the abusing. He just stayed silent most of the time. And he couldn't help watching Michael's ass as his best friend carried two of his bags to the room he'd be sleeping in. Shane couldn't help but blush at the fact of where he was looking.

'Here, this is your room,' Michael says proudly, stepping in. Shane see's why he's proud. The room has been done up, black walls, a bedside table, big double bed. Shane tilts his head, wondering why exactly he had a double bed. Maybe it was just conveniently there, and too much hassle for Michael to move it to a single one. Ah well, more space.

'Spacious,' shane grins, and for that minute, the bond him and his bestfrriend once had is there again, Michael reaches out&ruffles shane's brown hair, shaking his head, his own blonde hair messing in the process.

'good to have you back man,' Michael finally says, straight faced. Shane lets a relaxed expression take over his face and says - very cooly- 'good to be back.' then he genuinely smiles at Michael, his body warming, and the shaking expiring.

'by the way, I sleep late in the morning, so you'll be making your own lunch.' this stops shane in his act of pulling his clothes from the first bag.

'dude, before I left, you were up early. Came to drag me out of bed every morning.'

'yeah well,' Michaels eyes look dead. 'things have changed.'

'agreed,' shane sighs and pulls his shirt over his head, not caring that Michael is stood watching him, studying him&the bruises. Though shane does blush, just a little, and tenses to look more built. Pulling the new top over his head, he says, calmly 'by the way, the bruises, are nothing.'

'like I said before, that's not nothing.' Shane sighs at Michael's response and take the blonde's cheeks in his hands.

'I'm fine. &trust me, it is nothing.' Michael doesn't even answer, just shakes his head. 'Michael.' Shane runs his finger over Michael's cheek to calm him. 'It was my father okay, nothing that you haven't seen before.' which was true. Even a little bit before allysa died, he'd abused shane. And Michael knew about that. But Michaels ears still turn red, which means he's angry. Shane can't help but smile at Michael's anger. The blonde ALWAYS looked out for him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ey ups guise! CHAPTER 3. Sorry it took so long.. Started school again& into GCSE subjects too. SO MUCH HOMEWORK. Got this written for you tho. Warning; contains drug abuse/ strong depressing subjects, suicide thoughts, etc. but keep reading PLEASE, it gets better! **

_Shane_

_He doesn't know what's happening, until he feels a sharp blow to his ribs, striking through him, throbbing violently. He squeezes his eyes tight shut, holding his palms above his head, trying to at least protect some part of his body. _

'_it's your fault,' Shane's dad drops onto his knees and hisses the sharp words in Shane's ears as he shivers. 'you should have saved her, you bastard!' again, Shane is met by a violent punch, this time to his face. Soon, Shane knows just by the sticky feeling, his nose is broken, and bleeding. _

'_Get off me dad,' Shane growls this time, and then seems surprised by his harsh tone. Quickly, he scrambles to his feet, balling his hands into fists and standing in a fighting stance. 'you've controlled me, abused me, treat me like shit all this time! It wasn't my fault! If you weren't such an abusive twat…' That receives another kick, but Shane doesn't care. Even when his dad holds the knife on his throat, cutting in shallowly, Shane continues. Because he doesn't care if he dies anymore. 'JESUS, sober up and then you'll see!' With strong, steady hands, Shane pushes his dad away and storms out, with only his faded canvas bag hanging off his shoulder loosely. _

_Stumbling through Morganville after what feels like years shocks Shane. He doesn't feel it much though, because his vision is blurred. Probably from the drugs. He knows exactly where he's going, and he knows what to do. The thing was, Shane had no idea what the point in living was anymore. He had no one, __**nothing. **__He had to face it, no one was coming riding to the rescue. And when he reaches his destination, the chill on his arms is suddenly notices. He wraps his arms around himself and stares at the gravestone. Shane hardly cried, but now tears pour, they __**flood**__ from his eyes, as the blur wears off. He remembers her smile, how she wore her hair in two plaits. Hell, even how she used to mock him, jump on his bed in a morning. He remembers how happy they were, as a family. His dad was sober, his mum cheerful. All together, they were unstoppable. But now… shane shakes his head again to remind himself the fact that he __**has**__ to do this. __**needs**__ to do this. And without a second thought, he shoved the pills down his throat, swallowing them in one. Then he braces himself, on his knees, head bowed, ready for death to take over. _

_Michael. _

Michael stares at Shane, who is shaking, sweating, and curling himself up into a ball. Not really knowing what to do, Michael reaches his hand out to grab shanes wrist, holding it tight, trying to get him to stop flailing. Really, all he can feel is worry, it's his first night back, and he's this way.. This is Shane Collins. Not exactly normal.

'Shane?' Michael whispers into the dark, then reaches across to flick the small lamp.

'I.. he's there. Why am I here, I'm supposed to be dead.. I can't Michael I'm sorry I need…' Tilting his head to the side, Michael tries to make sense of Shane's words. _He thinks he's supposed to be dead. _it finally clicks.

'Shane, listen to me.' Michael shouldn't admit his feelings for the boy yet, but he pulls him into a hug. Shane's body is tense, but Michael rubs his hand up Shane's back, a soothing touch. Shane automatically relaxes into the hug, yet still panting slightly.

'I'm sorry Michael.' When he finally speaks, his voice is a raw whisper.

'Shane.. What happened out there?' Michael pushes shane back, with his hands firmly on his shoulder, and looks the brown haired boy in the eyes. 'Why are you like this?'

'I can't… I mean, he started being abusive, and it wasn't too bad, a kick now and then, mainly it was the fact he was always drunk, and hardly came home…' Even though they were advancing with words, Shane's voice still sounded shaky as hell, and full of fear. 'Mum, she wouldn't do anything, just sat there, and when dad would come home, she'd quietly dismiss herself to the bathroom, god only knows what she did,' Shane's Adam's apple works hard in his throat. 'It got to the point where I couldn't take it, so I ran, spend all day stumbling through the town and wondering what to do. When I came home, dad was still out, probably at the pub. And I called mum. She wasn't there.. So I checked in the bathroom… and there she was.' the colour in Shane's eyes completely died. And all of a sudden, Michael understood. 'Floating there.' Shane's eyes are flooded with tears now, and Michael pushes shane back just a little, and cups the boys pale cheeks in his hands. He's unable to break eye contact.

'Shane, I can't take away the pain. I can't make them come back, but I can tell you this; everything'll be okay, and I'll be here for you, no matter what. Don't look back, okay?' Shane says nothing, but nods.

_Shane. _

Before Shane can even register what's going on, Michael lips are on his. And they're sweet, soft and make him tingle all over. All those other girls he'd kissed… Shane has never been kissed like this.. And he liked it. God, he loved kissing Michael. Lifting his hands up, he runs a hand through Michaels hair and his other arm around his neck. Michael's strong arms snake around Shane's waist. This should freak him out, but instead he just feels intent, happy… and the pain for a moment is taken away. Before pulling away from the kiss, Michael grabs Shane's hands, then presses his forehead against shanes. None of them say anything for a while.

'Michael glass.. You're amazing.' Shane says, smiling, for the first time in months. Michael pulls one hand away from Shane's hand and carefully wipes away his tears.

'you are Shane. And you should go to bed.' Shane nods in agreement, and pulls out of Michael's grip.

'stay with me?' he begs, and watches as Michael's face lights up. Michael climbs off the bed and strips down to his boxers, blushing slightly. Shane laughs, and admires Michael's body. Funny, shane never thought he'd be gay. But he quickly dismisses reality trying to set in, and pulls his shirt over his head, stripping down to his own boxers. Then when he climbs into bed, Michael pulls the covers over them both, and shane cuddles into his embrace, feeling accepted, warm, _loved. _

**THERE. What did we think? Took me ages to write, and again, sorry it's so short! But I hope you like this:3. I really enjoyed writing this chapter, although - I will admit it- it did bring actual tears to my eyes. Review please;*. **


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